I awoke at 2am this morning, because I was anxious about 'going back to school', in the form of Adult Education, on a Food Hygiene Level 2 Course that I'd personally chosen to explore for my own satisfaction.
I'm a sucker for learning new stuff that 'Blows My Frock Up' and I'm a sucker for BBC Radio 2 at ALL hours of morning, noon and night, and thankfully, hitting that dial Kids, soon began to bang out The Zs again, snoring into my pillow, and dribbling all over The Cat by 4am.
Anyone unsure of my inflection here, should realise that I'm not suggesting BBC Radio 2 'Sends You To Sleep', only that it beautifully lights both ends of my musical candle.
At 7am, with a perfectly-timed rude-awakening from Mr. Evans, my hissy-fit Teas-Made made A Mug of Tea Just For Me... If you're older than me, and haven't got a Teas-Made, you're clearly Completely And Utterly Bonkers.... If you're younger than me: take my advice and get one.
You may think of me as an Abfab 'Eddie' or 'Patsy' but if you yourself had to get out of a nice warm bed approximately three-floors up from Your Kettle, with no evidence of oil central heating yet this Autumn, spiral stone staircases on an outside wall with no carpets and can't find your slippers because you're having 'A Senior Moment', you'd know exactly where I'm coming from....
I'd asked Trousers to set the 'Nat Sav' up for me in my MoneyPenny Truck (4x4xBond) even though I knew roughly where I was going, because I didn't want to be late. So with ample time on my hands before I left, I was able to put together a beautiful and healthy picnic lunch for myself, which made me feel incredibly special, and gave me the added confidence that I felt I needed today.
I know it isn't remotely similar, but it's a bit like having matching Bra and Knickers on, with the only person knowing that being You...?
After two minutes in her company, I got to wondering why not all of us have been blessed with the same ease of personality and confidence as The Fantastic Tutor we were blessed with today, or indeed, that brilliant ability to connect so well with your audience, but felt safe in the knowledge that I would be taught well, and now fed well.
Throughout the day, I found myself surprised on a number of levels:
Surprised at what I actually knew.
Surprised at what I didn't know.
Surprised at what I thought I knew, but was wrong about.
Us 'Students' were a complete mix of genders, generations, race and creed, and we all found an affinity there today, and that itself was so beautifully refreshing.
Come 'Crunch Time'....With 40 minutes on the clock, we had 30 'multiple choice' questions to answer at the end of our tuition.
I'm as intelligent as the next person, but when you're faced with A, B, C or D at the end of six hours or so, you begin to 'not undersand the question' on the piece of paper in front of you.
A bit like University Challenge of a Monday.
I took a methodic approach to it though, answering the questions I knew the answers to immediately, and going back over the questions I was unsure answers to at the end when I was 'calmer' and better able to identify the correct answer.
Be safe in the knowledge that I restricted my t-shirt over the head, running round the place like a bloke having scored a goal on a football pitch till I got back to the safety of my own Living Room.
And thankfully, with Trousers not having arrived home yet, and the cat still asleep in her greenhouse, I was able to do that with as little, or as much decorum and dignity as I felt suited the occasion.
However.... Only I will know....
Shall I let you know if I 'passed'?
Bless You For Watching.