Sunday, 13 December 2009


Which about sums up my Funny Farm blog, actually...! (see Wellie wet herself laughing?) and may I be the first to wish "A Very Merry Christmas" to each and every one of you Flakes, both at home, and abroad, who enjoy reading about our new life Down On The Funny Farm.

If it wasn't for you lot reading this, I prolly wouldn't bother, but you've been kind enough to goad me on, and some of you even think I should write a book! Are you MAD girl?! Just where on the planet would I find the time? I am quite tempted though! It'd have to be a publication of my Funny Farm Blog I'm afraid. Would that do?

The Queen has her Christmas Message (and I was rather saddened that she didn't make reference to the rather lovely homemade Cape Goosegog & Passionfruit Jam I gave Charles & Camilla - but no matter....), and my own Christmas Message to all of you Flakes reading this, is "Have you thought about getting out more?"

Incidentally - I notice that either side of Flakey, the snowmen spell NO. This is misrepresentation at it's highest level, because if you were able to look at the wider picture: their two mates on the left say "Let It" and "S", and their other mate on the right says "W".
Just in case Santa neglected to bring you a Jigsaw Puzzle for Christmas, I'll leave you to work that one out for yourselves. Doh!

Now then! All I can tell you from the photo below (without bursting into floods of tears, I hasten to add) is that the contents of my kitchen are still residing in the Laundry and The Guest Room, on account of the fact that the new units and worktops were supposed to be 'done and dusted' the week before Christmas.

Yes - very well-spotted Children: No change there then!

You know what it's like when you feel like jumping up and down in a big muddy puddle, screaming your head off with clenched fists, and you don't care WHO sees you?
Well it's nothing like that.

Actually, I've been incredibly grown up and well behaved about it, which has driven Trousers and the cat completely nuts over Christmas, but it'll be all the more gorgeous for me at the start of Twenty Ten: a hugely exciting new chapter that I'm treating myself to! Twenty Ten, I mean......

Now will you just look at how creative Wellie has been in the sitting room? I've been 'collecting' realistic silk foliage'n'stuff whenever I see it at our local garden centre, because you can use it in the house 12 months of the year, in some arrangement or other, and then come Yuletide, it comes into its' own over a hot mantle, looking as fresh as a daisy until it's time to 'dismantle' (clever Wellie, and I wonder if that's where the saying arose?!) and tuck back into vases around the home once again.

(Sorry about all the rosettes in the cabinet, but we haven't found a better home for them yet since we moved, she lied)

As a child, I spent many a weekend and school holidays with my paternal grandparents, and this glass-fronted cabinet contained a Treasure Trove of Silver teapots, glasses, jugs, picture frames, teaspoons and trinkets. I simply adored it, and finally, when my mother got custody of it, she kept its' contents, and let me buy the cabinet off her (I know, don't even go there!) I'm having such fun now, creating my own Treasure Trove: my 'knock me over with a feather' 1st & 2nd Rosettes for local veg shows, my Thank You Letter from Clarence House for 'The Jam'.... and who only knows what will happen to add to it this coming year. Isn't it exciting?

But I've got to leave you now. I'm in the last throws of making a Roman Blind for the kitchen.
Have YOU ever made a Roman Blind Boys'n'Girls?
No. Unfortunately, Wellie hasn't either.......!

Bless you for being here.

Sunday, 6 December 2009

Festively Trying!

Personally, If I'd of known, with it being Christmas an' all....I'd of taken my sox off.. But you just can't trust a bloke with Swine Flu to take a photo of your girlfriend that she'd like. Obviously....

But just how far away can you get from your partner when they've got 'Swine Flu' and you're trying desperately to be someone that they love?
Not only has Trousers had 'Man Flu', children, but we're positively convinced that he's had 'Man Swine Flu' this last week.... I've not seen him this poorly for Ages, and just in case his bosses are reading this: Ben, this is entirely your fault, and I suspect that your girlfriend was entirely right with her diagnosis my friend, and I don't thank you for one minute for giving it to him, so see me after class, thank you. X

Although, to be perfectly honest, Trousers and I are not only arguing as to who gave what to whom now, because I looked after a kiddie-winkie who had a snuffly...... But No. Definitely. Your workmates Trousers!!

Anyway.... when Trousers took himself off up the stairs to Bedfordshire this weekend, I've managed to 'tweak' a few Christmas Decorations that might make him smile in the morning (don't hold your breath though..... I won't!)

And I got SO magnificently 'Told Off' for going up the ladder and putting this little half tree up after Trousers had retired gracefully to bed .........

Because I could have fallen off the ladder, and he would never have known until the morning.
Well 'Woopie Doo' - how do you think I get the rest of your life/dinner sorted when you're not here then? DOH?
Anyway, kids, I bought this Half-Christmas-Tree about 20 years ago, and I thought it was so brilliant that you could just hang it on a wall - because in those days I lived in a flat, and no room to have a proper tree in a full-sized room. But now, I just love my Half-Trees (and they're starting to sell them again - so thank goodness I kept them, AND my flared trousers, kipper ties and bell-bottoms?!)
And now this week, I've been trying to make good use of the oranges for decorations, so I bought some green ribbon at 20p a metre, and I've been making tree decorations. To be perfectly honest, I've made so many now, that I'm beginning to lose the will to live.....

Which is why I kind of distracted myself with this little decorative kitchen project above the Rayburn, and it doesn't do itself justice photographically unfortunately......

BUT! I am so excited (see Wellie Jump Up & Down) because not this coming week, but the week after, I am allegedly to have my new kitchen units installed, and NEVER in a month of Sundays did I ever think that this would happen before Christmas, so that's a HUGELY lovely surprise for me.....
Which does mean, that when our very good friends, The Piglets, and Paulie's Bestest Friend "In The World", come for New Year that I have no excuse in the universe for not cooking a lovely dinner, because I'll have some worktops for a change!)....
Thank you for being here.